The Rudeness Of Wankers

Had an encounter with a wanker this morning.

I saw the train pull in at the tube station so as I ran past the ticket window I called out "Can you open the gates please!" as getting the pram through the normal ticket gates can be a bit tricky especially if you are as spatially challenged as I am. Why do you think I don't drive a car.

I will add, that this request was delivered cheerfully and did not warrant the wanker behind the counter shouting "Yes! Yes! Yes! It's OPEN! The gate is OPEN!" So I went to the gate where prams are normally let through and returned to the counter to tell him, very politely, the gates were not open. More shouting. In fact, in case I don't mention it again, can I say that every time this wanker spoke to me, he was shouting. "THE GATE AT THE BACK! IT'S OPEN! OPEN I TELL YOU!" I told him, very calmly, there was no need to shout at me. Then he seemed a bit confused as he shouted "YOU STOP SHOUTING!" So I tells him "I'm not shouting sir, you are shouting. Please calm down."

Now I will add, at this point, never do I normally address anyone as sir, but in my head I already knew I would be making a complaint about this so I thought I'd throw 'sir' in to illustrate how polite and humble I am.

So, continuing to get confused he goes "YOU CALM DOWN! I'M NOT SHOUTING." Then realising he really was shouting he added "I'M SHOUTING SO THAT YOU CAN HEAR ME." Now that's a bit pathetic. Because he was not sitting a mile away behind a concrete wall, he was behind a glass pane with a microphone and I have managed several conversations in this way with no shouting at all. "You have an unpleasant tone" I told him to which he shouted a bit more then stormed off.

I waited a few minutes for the train, got steamed up and went back to the counter and called for him. He eventually came back after trying to ignore me and I asked him for his name. More shouting and confusion. "YES! YES! YOU CAN HAVE MY NAME! WHY YOU WANT MY NAME! YOU CAN'T HAVE MY NAME!" He then shut the blind despite the fact there was a customer waiting to be served behind me, looking flabbergasted. I turned round to tell her the full story, at which point a couple of builders knocked on the wankers door, and upon overhearing my story one of them raised his eyebrow in sympathy, and as the wanker let the workers in I muttered "Someone round here isn't getting enough sex". I didn't say it loud enough for the wanker to hear, I hope, as I wouldn't want it to come up during the investigation. I only said it to make the builders laugh. They did snigger a bit.

After years of letting the wankers get away with, I recently decided that no more Mr nice guy, I am going to complain. So I just have. I managed to email my complaint in precise detail, because I actually went to the trouble of jotting notes immediately after the experience. I was going to record my encounter on my mobile, dictaphone style but even I thought I was now getting a bit carried away.

Which reminds me. How comes I have had no reply to my complaint letter which I submitted about two months ago to the Thomas and Friends merchandisers for the crappy light gadget I bought at the show which fell apart after a slight knock and the helium balloon which only lasted three days as opposed to several weeks? Time to complain again.

Empowering stuff this is. Don't let the wankers get away with it. We deserve more. COMPLAIN.